Funny New Year’s resolutions

The best New Year’s resolution: laugh more! So let’s start this year with some funny New Year’s resolutions:

• I will avoid taking a bath whenever possible to conserve more water
• I will try to figure out why I really need nine e-mail addresses
• I will give up chocolates totally. 100%. Completely. Honestly….
• I will stop sending e-mail and text messages and be on the phone with the same person at the same time
• I will think of a password other than “password”
• I will not tell the same story at every get together
• I won’t worry so much
• I will cut my hair or I will grow my hair
• I will not ring the stewardess button on airplanes just to get her phone number.
• I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses
• I will try to drive closer to the speed limit
• When I hear a funny joke I will not reply: “LOL… LOL!”
• I will start buying lottery tickets at a luckier store
• I will watch more TV. It’s very educational
• I will work less and take it easy
• I will take up some worthwhile new habit, like smoking – it helps keep tobacco workers in jobs
• I will stop saying:” Ooh, that feels nice” whenever the security guys frisk me at airports
• My New Year resolution is: 1024 by 968 pixels!
• And I will learn what the hell “resolution” means.

Happy Funny New Year Everyone!

Courtesy of:

New Year Festival
Funny New Year Resolution